How to love your in-laws; even if they aren’t so lovable

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This is a blog I wrote for my client: Boy Keeps Girl

Marriage is such a beautiful part of life! How amazing is it when two people meet, fall in love and decide to dedicate their lives to one another? True love is the most magnificent “gift” you can give or receive. There are no words to describe it. A couple’s journey is so much fun. Two people start to date, fall in love, get engaged and then start planning the wedding! Once the wedding day is over; it’s time to start your life together as husband and wife! How fantastically exciting. When you begin your life as husband and wife; you are essentially blending two families together as one. This can prove to be difficult in certain circumstances.

Marriage tips: How to get along with your in laws

First off, you have to be grateful that the in-laws exist merely for the simple fact they’ve helped to create your soulmate; the love of your life! That alone is reason enough to make it all work. Certain people get very lucky by way of in-laws and receive non meddling, drama free, happy and healthy in laws. Other people on the other hand might not feel so warm and fuzzy about the in laws. No worries; I’m here with some tips!

The in-law files

  • It all boils down to respect doesn’t it? Start with that. Respect your in laws no matter what. Remember that they really do have yours and your spouse’s best interest at heart.
  • Schedule quality time with them. Take the time to have real conversations and get to know each other. You’re family now after all!
  • Speak your truth honestly and effectively. No one can read minds so it’s important to keep those communication lines open.
  • We all strive to make the best decisions we can with the information we have at hand. Try to remember that the in-laws have their own set of ideas based on their generation and/or how they’ve been brought up. Be patient if their ideas differ from yours.
  • Always treat your spouse with respect; especially when their parents are around. Even though you may be having a disagreement; it’s important to maintain your private life. Your in laws don’t need to know EVERYTHING (even if they think they do). Fight fairly and privately.
  • Be grateful and thankful for where you are. You’re a newlywed starting off your new life with your love after all! Be thankful for your in laws; some people don’t have any family and yours has just grown. How lucky are you!

Hugs and Loves,

Wishes for the Soul

Tianna Leigh 

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Communication tips for couples

Check out the blog I wrote for my client Boy Keeps Girl!

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When people think about what is necessary for a healthy, long lasting and happy relationship one of the top answers will be: communication. It does not matter if it’s a romantic, platonic or professional relationship; honest and authentic conversation is step one. Often times’ people get into situations that escalate into bigger problems simply because someone was not communicating their truth.

Keep your relationship healthy!

When explaining your side of the issue; try to avoid phrases such as “you always” or “you never”; generalizations minimize the effort your partner does give.

Think before you speak. Sounds simple, but it works wonders.

Avoid yelling or using derogatory terms when communicating with your partner. No one likes to feel attacked or unheard. Speak from your heart.

Never assume. Not one of us can read minds. When in doubt; ask!

Try to empathize with your partner. Yep, that means putting yourself “in their shoes”.

Ensure you’re in the right time and place for the conversation. Being able to give each other your undivided attention will help to solve the issue(s) at hand.

Focus on the current issue at hand. Bringing up past or other issues only muddies up the water. Let’s focus on solving one issue at a time.

Don’t bring other people into your discussion. Other people’s opinions don’t matter as much as your partner’s.

Don’t jump to conclusions or interrupt your partner.

It does matter HOW you say things. Be mindful of your tone.

Disagreements are bound to happen; we’re all human with our own opinions after all! Let’s not forget our feelings that play a huge role too. Speak from your heart and from your love; that will make a huge difference.

Hugs and Loves.

Tianna Leigh

Wishes for the Soul

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