Lonely and insecure can make you do some pretty upsetting, unpleasant and downright unhealthy things. You settle. You accept lies as truth. You belittle your wants. You lower your standards. All making you less of yourself and more of who you think you “should be”. This most definitely plays a role in the dating game. The saying is true “if it isn’t a game then why are there so many players?”
You see yourself as being able to “fix” someone. You aspire to be the “cool chick” in his life. You think that getting physical is getting you closer to where you want to be in your made up “relationship”. And why? The lonely is making you nuts girl! You take the little scraps of time and affection that he’ll pacify you with until he goes back to his bad behavior. Ladies are so attracted to the “bad boy” image, but most of the bad boys live up to their names and they treat you BADLY. You tell yourself that he’s an asshole and then run right back to him when he shows you some sweet nothings…which in all actuality are just that…a whole lot of NOTHING. You talk to your girlfriends for hours pondering why me?! Making excuse after excuse. Telling yourself that he is just “busy”! Let me use one of my favorite quotes here “Busy is another word for asshole. Asshole is the name of the guy you’re dating” Crying and telling yourself you’re done and that you’re going to lose his number; then secretly stalking his Facebook page. LOL! C’mon ladies, have we all been there or what? It sounds pathetic and really it is! I’ve talked to my girlfriends countless times about all of these same issues at one time or another.
If someone makes you feel worse than better about yourself it’s time to cut them out of your life. These kinds of men will keep wasting your precious time as long as you are letting them. Men like this exist because a lot of women out there allow them to. It all boils down to you. Do you want to give someone who makes you feel so awful so much power over your emotions? Let me answer that one for you…H-E-L-L no. Although, it does take YOUR aha moment to come for you to truly get it though. Everyone can talk until their blue in the face but until you can look in the mirror and see the amazing woman that your best friend can see; you’ll keep making these bad decisions.
My wish is for every woman to see her worth. To believe in herself. To love herself. To show herself respect. To know when to walk away. To know when letting go is better than holding on. True beauty comes from a woman who can hold her head up high and know that she isn’t taking any BS from anyone! Who can be her own best company! At the sight of any less than worthy behavior coming from a man in her presence she high tails it right out of there and keeps walking.
The bottom line is this…there are good men out there looking for good women like yourself. Trust me when I say that crazy, mean and selfish is not something that only MEN are; there are plenty of those kind of women out there too. Although sorry guys my focus tonight is for my ladies 🙂 Not all the good men are taken and not all men are dogs. I’m guilty of using such phrases myself 😉 but I know some REAL men and they have restored my faith. I just want to spread the message to my ladies that you have a choice. Choose to respect yourself and the “right man” will respect you and will show you what love really feels like.
“Sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together” Believe it my loves!
© Tianna Wahl and http://www.wishesforthesoul.wordpress.com, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Tianna Wahl and http://www.wishesforthesoul.wordpress.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.